Why Do I Play Poker?

February 12, 2010

Full Tilt Poker — I Banned Myself

Filed under: Bad Beats, Full Tilt Poker, Poker — Tags: , , , , — WhyDoIPlayPoker @ 4:00 am

It used to be that I would put $100 in my FTP account and have a good time. Play a few sit-n-gos and win or lose, it was entertaining.

Wait, what the fuck am I say­ing? I NEVER and I mean NEVER have really felt that way. I am com­pet­i­tive to the bone and every fiber in my body always wants to win. $1, $5, $100, I don’t care. I want to be the best and I want to win. Ok, I got that off my chest.

So 2 days ago I put $100 into Full Tilt and got ready for some sit n go action.  First 2 go well, a first place and a third place. Then, I hit the skids. In the course of 2 hours, I played 6 multi table tour­na­ments.  I play my usual game — tight early on, then open up as the blinds get higher in order to steal blinds, then when it gets to the bub­ble stage I either push or fold.  It usu­ally comes down to coin flips and as every­one knows, you gotta win the flips if you’re gonna win the tourney.

I have come to accept that I am going to bust out before the money this way fairly often. It’s a bit­ter pill to swal­low when it hap­pens, but when I win the flips it is sweet per­fec­tion. This is a win­ning style of poker.….unless.…..

You lose every fuck­ing coin flip.

You see, on this par­tic­u­lar night I was run­ning really well pre-flop. I was catch­ing good cards, mak­ing the right folds and push­ing when I had the best of it. Only prob­lem was none of my hands would hold up. Don’t get me wrong, I am not cry­ing bad beat here. It just sucked to be kicked in the balls over and over. I was at worst a 60/40 win­ner in 7 coin flip sit­u­a­tions and didn’t win one of them. I got 2 outed, 3 outed and 4 outed over and over.

I’ll admit it. I titled. I steamed off $20 in a sit n go by push­ing on the flop with a queen high flush draw. Of course I got called by the Ace high flush draw. Just one of those nights.

In the end, I real­ize that on line poker just isn’t for me. Call me crazy, but I did the most extreme thing I could think of.

I BANNED MYSELF FROM FTP, permanently.

Instead of donat­ing money to unde­serv­ing poker play­ers, I have decided the next time I want to waste $100 play­ing online poker, I’ll just send a check to Haiti and then go play with my son.  Bet­ter use of time. Bet­ter use of money.

I play ONLINE poker to remind myself to never again play online poker.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Share/Bookmark

January 30, 2010

Free Online Poker — a safe way to be on full tilt

Filed under: Bad Beats, Full Tilt Poker, Online Poker, Poker — Tags: , , , , , , — WhyDoIPlayPoker @ 9:01 am

I am not a fan of free poker. It’s an oxy­moron. Poker by its very def­i­n­i­tion needs to be played for money. If it doesn’t hurt to lose, it’s not poker.

That said, I have come to real­ize there is a time and place for the free online game.

In order to win in poker, you have to be con­trolled, dis­ci­plined, smart and lucky. As we all know, you can be at the top of your game, do every­thing right, and still lose. That’s one of the most frus­trat­ing things about poker. Do every­thing right, but still lose.

After a week’s worth of los­ing, either due to bad play­ing (prob­a­bly) or bad beats (unlikely) I really want to say “fuck it” to good play.  This dis­ci­pline, con­trol and smart play hasn’t got­ten me any­where, so I think.

Enter FREE ONLINE POKER.

Talk about going all in with impunity. This is the place. 9–2 off UTG, sure. All in. Flop is A-A-K and I have pocket deuces. Fuck it. ALL IN!

This is where I go when I just can’t take it any­more. I can act like a jack ass. Push with junk. Call with junk. Act like a don­key. I get all of this out of my sys­tem. Wel­come to the don­key farm.

Truth­fully, I’m not happy until until at least six peo­ple are wish­ing can­cer on me in the chat win­dow. “What?  You want to play real poker? Get two nick­els to rub together, ass­holes!”  I’m here for a pur­pose. This is free poker and I’m going all in every hand until I damn well feel and or play better.

Besides, I don’t feel as bad mak­ing a bunch of jerks hate me as I do after kick­ing the dog or punch­ing a wall.  Ouch.  For the record, I never punched my dog. I did call him a douchebag once.

After 15 min­utes of being this poker maniac, I feel bet­ter. The best part is I worked out some frus­tra­tion and my bankroll is still intact.

I occa­sion­ally play free on-line poker to shake off the shit and stress from my real game.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Share/Bookmark

January 29, 2010

Full Tilt’s Rush Poker — A lesson in focus.….I think.

Filed under: Full Tilt Poker, Online Poker, Poker, Texas Hold'em — Tags: , , , , , , , — Why Do I Play Poker? @ 5:00 am

I wish I could tell you a sure­fire strat­egy to beat the online poker site’s new game.  But I can’t.  Not even close. I have no idea how to win in that game.  I think it starts with a raise and then I’m not sure where to go from there. Maybe a lit­tle patience might give you a leg up.  What do I know?  I’ve logged in for forty five min­utes and played more hands than my first six months of poker combined.

The thing that hit me most about Full Tilt’s Rush poker is how impor­tant it is not to look back.  In Rush, there is no way to see how the hand would’ve ended.  You’re whisked away to another table.  You have a new deci­sion to make. You don’t have time to think about what went right or wrong in the last hand.

Unlike reg­u­lar poker, in Rush there is no “What if?” because the hand really doesn’t exist any­more. There’s not even a way to see “What if?” Actu­ally, this is great, because if there ever were a shitty game, it’s  “What if?”   It’s a sub­tle vari­a­tion on the time­less clas­sic “Would’ve, should’ve, could’ve.” Actu­ally, it’s the same game with a dif­fer­ent title.  Kinda like play­ing NYC Monop­oly or Grate­ful Dead Monop­oly.  Same game, dif­fer­ent theme.

Now I’m not say­ing there isn’t a place for reflec­tion about your game or your life.  It’s essen­tial.  Just not at the table.

I always have to remem­ber to be in the moment at the poker table. That’s the only thing that mat­ters right now. Who cares if my KQ would have made a straight? Think­ing about it only dis­tracts me from the hand at hand. It’s a recipe to com­pound my losses or, if I’m bask­ing in the glory of an amaz­ing play, min­i­mize my wins.

So I’m going to keep play­ing Rush. Stay focused and try to avoid writ­ing blog posts while I’m doing it.  Because at  300 hands an hour, it’s damn near impossible.

I play poker to help me stay focused in the present.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Share/Bookmark

January 27, 2010

Poker Therapy

Filed under: Home Game, Online Poker, Poker, Winning Streak — Tags: , , , , , , , , , — Why Do I Play Poker? @ 11:05 am

In ele­men­tary school I got beat up every­day by Jarett Moore. We were about the same size, but for some rea­son when he picked on me, I wouldn’t fight back.

Thirty years later the sense of shame for never fight­ing back is still pal­pa­ble. Actu­ally, it’s embar­rass­ing and haunt­ing. The only com­fort I have in these mem­o­ries is that by not fight­ing back I prob­a­bly avoided liv­ing my life with a limp. Had I some­how man­aged to level Jarett, his brother or one of his 57 cousins would have removed my head and shat down my throat. R.I.P.

After thirty years on the shrink’s couch, I have finally learned to stand up for myself, though some­times my tim­ing is bad. When­ever there is a bully at the poker table, I always have the same knee jerk reac­tion: you’re not going to push me around. This is great when I have the nuts, but when I am on a stone cold bluff and Joe Bully re-raises, this reac­tion is a recipe for disaster.

Prob­lem is, I never believe people’s bets. My ratio­nal brain thinks there is a chance I am beat, but my alli­ga­tor brain says, EAT THAT FISH. You see, I have this gift. With 99% accu­racy, I can mis­tak­enly think some­one is bul­ly­ing me when they are not.

I real­ize that the poker table is a very expen­sive and com­pletely unsym­pa­thetic place to work out my child­hood tur­moils. When I am feel­ing strong, I look for and attack the poor suck­ers who have the tell tale signs of being in poker ther­apy. And yet some nights my child­hood gets the bet­ter of me. I am the sucker and have a very expen­sive poker ther­apy session.

You’d think by now I would pick a new place to work this out, but I have come to terms with the fact that from time to time I will find sadis­tic com­fort in being picked on. I guess I am addicted to the rush of con­fronta­tion and the chal­lenge of stand­ing up to the bully. Even if the only per­son I am fight­ing with is myself.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Share/Bookmark

Powered by WordPress